Why get married?

Posted: February 3, 2015 in BBF, Ma-Papel (Paperworks), Theology
Tags: , , ,

January 24. This is a moment I would forever remember. This was the day I co-officiated the wedding of a close friend and what was in my mind was the question, “why get married?” As a single person, I would be excited for my friends who tie the knot but at the same time, I watch and learn from others. Here are the reasons of why we should get married. This is actually the outline I used for the wedding. 🙂

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From L-R: Pastor Lowell Tallo (My mentor), Gloria (the bride), Edward (the groom), and me! 🙂

I. Marriage is God’s doing.

Gen. 1:27-28 “God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them. And God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth.’”

God initiated marriage. He is the one who said, “it is not good for man to be alone”. He designed every animal and said, “it is good”. Except for man. He was the one, who designed, in his great wisdom, that man should have a partner.

We trust that marriage is God’s doing, not the groom’s idea nor the bride. (Tweet this!)

II. God gave away the first bride

Genesis 2:22 “And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.”

He didn’t hide her and make Adam seek. He made her; then he brought her. He had fathered her. He gave her to the man in this absolutely new kind of relationship called marriage.

God brought the bride to the groom.

For those who are single male, wait for God to bring you your Eve. Have faith. And for those who are single ladies here, God is still preparing the “Adam” for you.

But ultimately, our hearts should be focused on God, not on finding “the one”. (Tweet this!)

III. God designed marriage

Gen. 2:24 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

He designed marriage. Marriage is a three way union. God – Husband – Wife. It does not mean that we ignore our parents, we still have to honor them. Rather, the focus of the union is the husband and wife and their commitment to God. All issues arise when one tries to dominate the other. When one thinks of himself/herself, or what other people think instead of what does God want.

If God designed marriage, then we ought to know Him to understand how this works. We can’t ask the barber, or the parlor for advice. We turn to Scriptures. We turn to people who have gone before us in this journey. Our parents. (Tweet this!)

IV. God performed the one-flesh union
Becoming one flesh, which is at the heart of what marriage is, is a union that God himself performs.
Verse 24 is God’s words of institution for marriage. But just as it was God who took the woman from the flesh of man (Genesis 2:21), it is God who in each marriage ordains and performs a uniting called one flesh that is not in man’s power to destroy.

This is implicit here in Genesis 2:24, but Jesus makes it explicit in Mark 10:8-9. He quotes Genesis 2:24 then adds a comment that explodes like thunder with the glory of marriage. “‘The two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

When a couple speaks their vows and consummates it, it is not man or woman or pastor or parent who is the main actor. God is. God joins a husband and a wife into a one-flesh union. God does that.The world does not know this. Which is one of the reasons why marriage is treated so casually. And Christians often act like they don’t know it. Marriage is God’s doing because it is a one-flesh union that God himself performs. (- John Piper)

When emotions are the primary basis for our decisions to get married, then emotions will also be the primary basis for our decisions to separate. When we realize that God is the one who designed it, and we are accountable to Him, then we can view marriage in a different light.

marriage is sacred because it is God who designed it. (Tweet this!) 

As a review, we can see that…

Marriage is God’s doing. He is the one who would lead the man to the woman, and the woman to the man. He is the ultimate designer of marriage. And we should hold marriage with sacredness. 

Marriage is patterned after Christ’s commitment to his church. He is the groom coming for his bride  (Matthew 9:15; 25:1ff; John 3:29). Christ paid for the dowry of his own blood for his redeemed bride. Christ will never leave his wife.

Staying married, therefore, is not about staying in love. It is about keeping covenant. “Till death do us part,” or, “As long as we both shall live” is sacred covenant promise—the same kind Jesus made with his bride when he died for her. Therefore, what makes divorce and remarriage so horrific in God’s eyes is not merely that it involves covenant breaking to the spouse, but that it involves misrepresenting Christ and his covenant. Christ will never leave his wife. Ever. Christ keeps his covenant forever. Marriage is a display of that! That is the most ultimate thing we can say about it.

Do you know Christ? It is my prayer that each of you would know Him! And it is my prayer for the couple that they would continue to put Christ in the center of your relationship. Put God in your conversations. Lead each other to God.

Let me pray for you.

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